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Dartegnian's old blog|Where dreams are penned|Stories are written|Ideas are built|And set in motion

Turnout


It's only been 11 days? It's been 11 days. Whoa, in just 11 days, my life has turned around so much—quite literally. The last time I posted here, I was on the brink of tears, unsure of what to do in life, and scared of the uncertain road ahead. For a while, I thought that I'd never sit with my blockmates in class anymore, and that I might leave Asia Pacific College for good. My life 11 days ago looked very grim, and my situation was extremely hopeless, but I had hope and looked up. I gathered all the hope I had left, stuffed it into a small jar, and threw it against a wall—sending it on its way.

And it worked.

A day after I published my "Flying High" post, I received a message from someone. They asked why I wasn't going to study anymore, and I told them about my situation in life. They offered to help me and cover my tuition in APC. They also agreed to help me with my daily budget, as I had told them that, even though I may be able to study, I'll still have trouble going to and from APC because we literally can't even afford going to that place on a weekly basis, much less affording the tuition fee. (I'd love to talk about my financial situation and how bad it's gotten, but it's best to keep it between the people I'm close to and I.)

At this point, I was feeling very ashamed to receive help for them but I genuinely had no other choice. I doubt I'll get anywhere with the current skillset I have (even though people claim it's good enough), and finishing my degree in computer science is one of my main goals in life. So, obviously, I didn't even hesitate to take the offer.

Fast forward to today, I'm comfortably living here with them. Sure, you can say that I'm sort of (in the loosest sense) adopted by them, but I don't really want to put a label on my situation. I'm just glad that, rather than being sent into the slaughterhouse with no one willing to help, I was helped and got offered an alternate path in life.

I'm now studying in APC again! And my family's doing their best (and by "my family," I mean my mom) to get out of debt and help restructure the family again after what happened. They're now finding ways on how to help with my sister's education for the time being.

And no, I wasn't helped by my dad. He hasn't helped me since... he hasn't helped me at all. He's here in the Philippines, he knows about my blog, he knows about my current situation, and he's doing literally nothing to help me. (Gee, thanks.) Now I hear he's making some stupid, cockamamie, half-assed plan to "help me," but it doesn't involve helping me financially, physically, or even morally.

I don't know what my dad is going to do, but I'm sure it will only frustrate me, and only prove how much of a sham his words really are. Sigh, I'm just glad that not everyone in this world is like him, and it's actually heartwarming to know that there are genuinely good people on this earth—people who'd help and act out of their own goodwill, asking for little to nothing in return.

With that out of the way, what now? I don't really know, but I'm here to study. I'm not really suffering here, quite the contrary. What's just relieving to me is that I don't hear about money problems every single day or week, nor do I worry about where to get the money I need, nor whom to ask lunch from later. It seems that I've (finally) been offered a place where I could just focus on my studies and improving my skills in peace.

I'm still unsure of the road ahead, but it's looking bright, and I'm keeping my head up. I have no reason not to do well, as my family—and my new family—(and no, that doesn't include you, dad) is counting on me to do well, and put my best foot forward. I'm just really happy that I finally got another chance at studying in college again.

I'm glad to be back 😄

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